I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Randomize
