im drinking this country out of the recession.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
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