A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
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