you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
