I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
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