and you said cock pushups were impossible
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
