I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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