i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
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