the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Randomize