so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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