So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
