the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
