So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize