I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
