found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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