You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I wish you could order shots online.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
