Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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