people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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