Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
