just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize
