What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
