And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
