the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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