We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
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