put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
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