I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
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