Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
