Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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