im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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