You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
