im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
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Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
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