she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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