I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Randomize
