God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
