Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
