Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
