I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
