You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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