okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
