How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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