Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Randomize
