His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
My feet surprised me
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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