Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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