I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize