I need help removing her.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Randomize
