I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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