My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
