i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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