problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I just blew my weed a kiss
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Randomize
