I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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